Saturday, March 27, 2010


This, my friends, is horse poo. This is horse poo in the outdoor riding area at the stable I take lessons at. After agreeing to the glamorous position of stable-bitch, I have activated my radar to find and gather horse puckey. Yes, horse puckey. I like saying it, it has a nice snappy sound to it.

So, Thursday, I didn't have a lesson, just stable duty. My teacher is going on vacation and I've been so disgustingly busy at work that I put my lesson off for a couple of weeks. I got there, and there wasn't anyone in the arena, no one visiting their horses, and none of the stable owners...just a quiet, sunset filled barn with the soft sounds of horses, birds, and fresh air. I cleared my head and realized I had work to do. I mentally went over everything I had been instructed to do, and took a quick survey of who was in a stall and which ones needed to be cleaned. Well....remember, I'm GREEN.... I wonder if there was a hidden camera, because it would've been hilarious to watch....even play a drinking game to.

Big Green Girl's HorsePuckey drinking game rules:

  • Take a drink of whatever you're having for every time BGG says, "hi horsie!"
  • Take a shot for every trip BGG takes to confirm her duties on the bulletin board. (I was so worried I'd forget something)
  • Take a shot for every trip BGG takes with the wheelbarrrow for more hay. (This will be many, considering she kept losing count of how many flakes she needed and for which horse)
  • Turn around in a circle while staring at the floor for the number of times she didn't put the shavings fork within reach.
  • If you're not passed out by now, you're not human.
Suffice to say, I had fun- as I have said before, cleaning around horses is very calming and fulfilling....though I do wish one of those horses were my own.....I feel like a student who is waiting for a master to tell me, "Ah, yes, Grasshopper, now you are ready for your own horse." But really, is anyone really absolutely ready?

When you got your first horse (assuming you have one) were you ready??

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